
Review: ANGELS FALLEN (2019)
Trying to Google some background info on Angels Fallen all I kept getting were links for Angel Has Fallen, maybe it was an omen. Or, given the film’s plot, a prophecy. It didn’t take long until I was wishing I’d stuck with Gerard Butler kicking ass.
Gabriel (Houston Rhines) was one of the best demon hunters around until the death of his wife Eve drove him into retirement. Now apparently he hangs out in bars, hustles pool and drinks heavily. Until one afternoon when it turns out he’s playing against some demons. Cue some bad fight choreography and worse CGI. It also heralds the return of his former teammate Michael (Michael Teh, Sharknado, Alien Rising). It seems they need his help, the Four Angels have landed.

Along with alchemist/psychic Hanna (Nicola Posener, Shook, Mythica: The Necromancer), they head off to Europe. After a run-in with former ally Valentina (Caroline Amiguet, Demon Protocol) who now runs a safe house for demons, they realize just how bad the situation is.
Angels Fallen is an attempt to update the supernatural film. They track demons with a phone app. And dispatch them with laser-sighted firearms rather than stakes and crosses. There are even Tasers that work on demons as well as humans.
We also get trappings of spy films, Safehouses, labs for developing new weapons, (accessed via a corridor stolen from The Matrix films) and double agents. The mix could have been a lot of fun but the clunky script keeps that from happening. Writer Amanda Barton only has one other screenplay to her credit, The Amityville Terror. This is better than that was, but that’s not saying much.

Barton has appeared in several Asylum films and that’s what Angels Fallen frequently resembles. That and the non-Asylum Obsidian Hearts, though that was directed by Rene Perez (Death Kiss, Volcano Zombies), which is just as bad. Director Ali Zamani (Maul Dogs, Opus of an Angel) manages to put together a few good action scenes but most of the film falls flat. Unlike Jem (Nasia Jansen) who’s anything but flat, and provides the film’s highlights, an impressive pair of evil angel breasts.
Eric Roberts (Surge of Power: Revenge of the Sequel, Hide In The Light) turns up in a pointless and annoying cameo. And despite the press release saying he plays the angel Gabriel, Michael Madsen (Shark Season, Lady Psycho Killer) plays Balthazar. Sadly not the one who hung out with the Cylons either.

Some of you can enjoy the cheese factor of an attack by a possessed doll that’s obviously the actor shaking it. Or a character carried off by a poorly rendered swarm of locusts. You may find Angels Fallen watchable. I didn’t.
Angels Fallen will be available from Uncork’d Entertainment on January 14th on DVD and digital.