Children of Camp Blood (2020) Review

Children of Camp Blood Poster

Having managed to deliver his best film in years with Return to Splatter Farm, Mark Polonia dips back into his past again. This time makes his fourth trip to Camp Blackwood home of the Camp Blood franchise to bring us Children of Camp Blood. Can he make lightning strike twice? Can he at least deliver a few rumbles of thunder?

Unfortunately, the credits aren’t even over before the red flags started popping up. The film’s music is credited to Ghost. This film’s budget wouldn’t have bought a ticket to one of their concerts let alone hired them. There are also several performers such as Jennie Russo (Konga TNT, Shark Encounters of the Third Kind) and Elissa Dowling (Girl on the Third Floor, Clown Fear) who aren’t listed on the film’s IMDB page. And, in the case of Ms. Dowling, are also probably out of the film’s price range.

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As it turns out they are indeed in the film, just not in footage shot for it. Children of Camp Blood revolves around people who have lost loved ones to the killer clown being brought to the camp for therapy to get over their trauma. Which means lots of recycled footage from the previous films. Of course, it doesn’t take long before they start getting killed off as well, turning Children of Camp Blood into the franchise’s answer to Friday the 13th: A New Beginning.

Camp Blood 8: Revelations was an improvement over the past few entries in the franchise, not that that was saying much. I was hoping Children of Camp Blood would continue the trend. Instead, we get a film that’s mostly a highlight reel recap of the franchise’s better kills with a bit of new footage to hold it together.

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The new material features Dr. Spanner, a psychiatrist with a drinking problem so bad he keeps a full bottle under his lab coat instead of a flask. He’s brought a bunch of rather overage “children” together. There are a couple of punks one of whom goes by the name Slick (Christopher Beacom, Sharkenstein), a long-haired guy named Rudy and Judy (Samantha Coolidge), the obligatory final girl. There’s also a groundskeeper (Yolie Canales, Deadly Playthings) with a violent past to serve as the film’s red herring.

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I know that’s vague, but the credits don’t give the characters names and IMDB wasn’t much help either. Not that it really matters because they’re just there to wander around and die until the utterly unsurprising reveal of who’s under the mask this time. Or the even less shocking final scene.

A major step backwards on all fronts, Children of Camp Blood is best avoided. If you really need to see it, it’s available to stream on Vimeo from Sterling Entertainment

https://youtu.be/RDct3RopYJg
Our Score

Jim Morazzini

Movie buff, gym rat and crazy cat guy